Chapter 135 – Girl and self-awareness
Mister Ilma and miss Shehan are getting used to life in the village, while being observed.
There aren’t any glaring problems so far.
Mister Ilma is doing his best, and miss Shehan almost never leaves his side, which the villagers say makes it easy to keep them under watch.
Phyto, the girl who was brought as a hostage, is living peacefully too.
I still don’t know if she can really communicate with god.
Miss Lan says it might cause problems if Phyto and mister Ilma start talking.
She says she doesn’t know how he will treat someone who supposedly can talk to god.
Meeting mister Ilma, gets me thinking that I need to be more aware of what I am and accept it.
I need to accept that I’m not normal.
He says with complete certainty I’m the miko.
I still don’t fully believe it, but I do know that I’m not like other people.
After meeting mister Ilma and being faced with his very heavy feelings towards me, I have to accept that.
But if I am the miko, what is the miko exactly
People say the miko is a person loved by god, the land where the miko lives will be prosperous, etc, but what does it mean to be loved by god It sounds like it means this person will always be happy, and nothing bad will happen to them, but that’s not true.
My life in the village where I was born was definitely not happy when compared to my life now.
I met Scifo, the gryphons, and Gaius, and felt happy.
I learned what it’s like to have a family, and care about people aside from them too.
Before that, I just survived.
But in the middle of this happiness, we lost mister Athos, and mister Nirushi’s village was attacked, so it’s not like everything was going well.
The elves wanted to sacrifice us, we fought a really strong monster, and the spirit tree still hasn’t recovered.
I made contact with another group of people without thinking about it well, and mister Roma died as a result.
Not everything in my life goes well, and I don’t have any reason to believe that will change.
If I am the miko, being the miko doesn’t guarantee happiness.
Miss Lan even theorizes that being the miko means getting involved in all sorts of things.
What is the miko
It’s a being loved by god, but if I am the miko, who is this god that likes me
A god watching over me…
The miko has all sorts of influence given by god.
If I wish for something, will god respond Phyto is said to be able to communicate with god, but if that’s true, shouldn’t she be called the miko My head is spinning.
If I’m the miko… And I’m going to do things other people can’t, I have to accept this reality.
There will probably be more people like mister Ilma, who enthusiastically look to me as the miko.
Beast people didn’t start treating me too differently after I told them I’m probably the miko, but that’s probably because I just happened to meet them.
If I’m probably the miko… No, if I am the miko, a lot of people will probably treat me differently, and I have to be careful with how I respond.
I don’t know how mister Ilma will respond to what I say, or if he’ll act on his own.
That’s why I have to be careful with what I do or say in front of him.
I want to be more natural, but I can’t.
I want to use what’s special about me to its full potential, and achieve my goal, so I have to accept what’s special about me.
There’s a very high chance that I’m the miko.
Reimar and Gaius changed, and I think it’s safe to say it’s because they turned into the ‘miko’s knights’.
I’m the miko.
I’ve thought for a long time that I’m probably the miko, but I will accept it.
I don’t know what that will change, but it’s just a matter of how I feel.
“God… God watching over me.
I’ll do, my best, so keep watching, over me, please.”
The god watching over me.
The main cause of me being different.
I’ll use this power well and make my wish come true.
I stand in front of the altar and wish for god to keep watching over me, and promise I’ll do my best.
—Girl and self-awareness
(After meeting a priest with deep faith in her, the miko accepts the truth.)